As one born in the brighter days of the year, for me, the late spring, is very much my time. I thrive on the bright early dawns and watching the regrowth in the garden. Nothing better than the sense of optimism in the air. But, must admit, I am actually terrified of the dark days of the late autumn and winter. Therefore, the forced effort of challenging the sheer lack of light induced activity, really tires me out. This is a recognized phenomenon known a seasonally affective disorder (SAD). I certainly suffer in these darker days. I have often considered a sort of hibernation. But there is happily so much of celebration to enjoy and a huge amount of fun be gleaned from being active and engaging with life at this time of year. There is no way that I am going to be denied the chance of demonstrating my social being. What miss a party, even if it is a virtual effort! On Tuesday (21st December), just after 4pm, eight minutes (I think), we had the Winter Solstice, when everything gets sort of reset and our planet is tilted back, in it's alignment to capture the light again. For me that change was profound and significantly felt. Certainly worthy of celebration in itself...I felt revived and woke with enough energy, on Wednesday, to get up and on preparing for the next few days. Days, that I was, earlier, in fact dreading... Especially as this was to be my second Christmas Day, without my Dear Mother... So with her, very much, in my mind and an incredible determination, I managed to get through it... However, I did feel the second one has been even harder than the first., The reality of the passing of time has been highlighted. The big question is, does the passing of time actually heal the pain of grief?... Can that question ever be answered? Then the great comfort of happy memories come to the forefront of the mind. I have a huge volume of memories that really keep me going. The other thing that I wish to be able to achieve is my idea to lead others in the happy encouragement of creative pursuits during the dark winter days that I have referred to. To this end, I really had hoped, before now, to have established what I call, "art, craft, nibble and dribble" social evenings, thus bringing together like minded creative people. The idea being, to enjoy the making of good things, in an inclusive, supportive, social and communal atmosphere. This is something I wish to achieve, once we are socially permitted to be able to do so.
Oh some restless thoughts at mid-night, on The Feast of Stephen. KB.
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